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    Dear Diva Rebecca,

    I have been living in a different state from where I grew up for the past five years. I have some great friends here and I am generally a happy woman. But I just can not help but feel some holiday blues. I am single having just recently broken up with my last boyfriend. He was not the "one"; so I am not sad about that, I am just a little lonely. All of my friends will be going home for Christmas, and I do not want to ask anyone to take me home with them. I was not able to fly home this year. So for Christmas, I will be all alone. I feel like such a loser! Sitting at home, by myself, watching TV on Christmas day! I can't help but feel some self pity and I am getting very emotional.

    Sincerely,

    Holiday Blues,
    Philadelphia, Pennsylvania


    Dear Holiday Blues,

    I think many of us have been in your shoes. I know I surely have. I moved to Houston after college with my ex and after we separated, I stayed in Houston instead of moving home. Most of my family was back home in New England and here I was, far away in Texas. Normally, I would go home for the holidays but every once in a while I was forced to stay in Texas. Even when you can surround yourself with tons of good friends, you still feel lonely without family. So I do know how you feel.

    Hopefully, your friends will ask you how you are spending the holidays and when they find out that you will be alone, one of them will ask you to join. However, that could make you still feel a little sad because he or she only invited you because you do not have anywhere else to go. Although that is not entirely the case, your friends would love to have you be with them for the holidays, you still will not be able to feel even more self pity.

    So I will tell you what you should do which will be an amazing fix for your problem. You need to find out where children are who need help this year and go see them. Do you know how many children are out there, living in foster homes and such, who have never even known what the comfort of family even feels like? Or visit a homeless shelter and volunteer for serving the Christmas dinner. Spend the day at a nursing home where forgotten elderly people are spending the day alone because their families were too busy to bring them home. There are so many places you can go where volunteers for Christmas Day will be sorely needed.

    By doing this, instead of feeling lonely for Christmas, you will feel needed. You are needed. It will make you feel so good about yourself that you went out and did something completely unselfish to help other people battle loneliness and disparity on Christmas Day. Your Holiday Blues will be lifted. You will undoubtedly make at least one person smile, and that is the best gift you can give yourself. And how about when people ask you what you are doing for Christmas? The response you will get when you tell people what you will be doing will be pure astonishment. Everyone will see you in a new light.

    Sincerely,

    Diva Rebecca

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