Dear Diva Rebecca,

I have a really really REALLY strange one for you. I have been seeing this man for about six months and it is really going great. I love him so much, in fact I think he is "the one". But just recently he has done something very strange to me twice and it has a sexual nature. It is so weird, that I don't know what to make out of it. Once would have been something I could forget about but because he did it twice I am a little perturbed. And there is no way I would ever tell my girlfriends...it is that fucked up! Okay, here it goes: after we have had sex before we went out on the town, he rubbed some of his sperm on my face and would not let me wash it off!! The first time I thought he was just being a big joker, but when he did it a second time I got creeped out. He would take some of it and rub it into my hairline. You would never see it but still...what is that about!? He keeps saying how much it turns him on to know that his cum is on me. And there is also the fact that he loves getting it on my face half of the time we have sex. What do you think?

Sincerely,

Aren't Facials Enough?
Los Angeles, CA

Dear Aren't Facial Enough?,

Heh, that one made the Diva laugh. Your man definitely has a fetish or two. And yes, I would have to say that I think that is a little bit strange. But still, everyone has their fetishes.

First of all, there are tons of guys out there who love facials. Why do you think that a "facial" is the prime scene in pornographic movies? In movies and magazines the best money making shots are those with the men's load shooting straight at an eager young girl's open and smiling mouth. When you see that same scene a thousand or some odd times, you can only expect that almost every guy will accept this as his fantasy at some point and will want to reenact their desire.

Everyone has fantasies and only the lucky ones allow themselves to act them out. Fantasies will always vary and change as time goes on. But everyone gets stuck with one or a couple of deeply captivating sexual mental images. Think about it. I am sure that there is one special fantasy that plays over and over in your mind every time you pull out that special vibrator for private playtime.

So he rubs a little of his cum on your face after the fact and will not let you wash it off. Yup, I have not heard that one before. But I do know that men love facials so I am sure that it ties in somewhere with that particular fantasy. And as you said, he loves to get it on your face.

Instead of feeling weird or shamed about the situation, I would learn to try to be a little more open about it. I am only saying this because you said that you really love him. If you were telling the truth, then you should at least try and accept his strange little fascination. Instead of assuming that what he is doing is bad or strange, be more open and accepting of his sexual tastes. Think of it as your dirty little secret that only he and you know about. That might be half of the allure to him, that it is kind of naughty.

I would try and explore it as well. Try and find out why he wants to repeat this primitive urge. I say "primitive" because it almost seems like he is trying to mark his territory. The best sexual relationships are based on trust. If he can trust you with his innermost desires (which he seems to be doing quite well) then you will be able to tell him what makes you tick when the lights turn off and the bedroom door closes. Try to get him to verbalize his fantasy. If you understand it better, you will have an easier time dealing with this strange preference.

I would only become worried if this particular act escalates any further without warning. If you become too uncomfortable, then let him know. You should probably learn if this is as freaky as it is going to get or if he is working his way up towards something really wild. Find out. But until then, the more open you are the more fun you will both be able to have.

Sincerely,

Diva Rebecca