Dear Diva Rebecca,

My wife has been menopausal for over three years with a very reduced libido. When aroused she is every bit as lubricated and climactic as ever. But sex now occurs only about every 5 to7 days. Any thoughts about how to increase frequency?

Sincerely,

Anxious Man,
Bullhead, Arizona

Dear Anxious Man,

There are so many different factors involved with menopause and sex. It would be in your best interest to consult a female physician to discuss options. After weighing all of the different factors involved in your particular case, the result and prescription will be uniquely yours (or hers).

For one thing it really matters if your wife has had surgery or not, and if so has she retained her ovaries? The part of the body responsible for making sex hormones are the ovaries and they in turn affect the brain. After menopause, the ovaries stop producing estrogen which is the major sex drive hormone. However, the ovaries will continue to produce testosterone which is fine because tissues in the body will convert it to estrogen. But is she has lost her ovaries, her sex drive will be lost. Also, even if she has her ovaries, it might also be that she has also stopped making testosterone. There are also things that can suppress these hormones such as certain anti-depressants. Check and see if she takes any medications.

Many women resort to HRT (Hormone replacement therapy) during and after menopause. This helps to bring back a happy and thriving sex drive. HRT is synthetic estrogen and progesterone which helps to eliminate the effects of menopause caused by the decreasing levels of estrogen and makes her feel normal again. The synthetic estrogen also works the same way as natural estrogen does to increase sexual stimulation in the brain. However, this is a treatment which must be discussed with a doctor and prescribed by a doctor. As with any treatment, this one may have some side effects and some people are against it.

Finally, they say that the best way to increase the sex drive for a women in menopause in a natural way is exercise. Besides hormones, it is the only other variable that can be correlated with sex drive. Although I can not find anything out about exercise being related to hormone production, I think it is just stated as an obvious cure because exercise makes the woman feel good about herself and give her energy.

Finally, you are doing pretty well. Most men don't even get that much sex from their wives when they are 30!

Sincerely,

Diva Rebecca